Marriage

I am this young lady woman with so much introspective on marriage and all, and clearly at the brink of also getting into one(after I actually choose which guy I want to get married to)…but when I look at it, its also a very scary thought, that I am about to have to give up my single life and want to be a MRS, which will translate into having storks delivering babies to my doors as well and all. But the truth f the matter is, that is not the fear….the babies and husbands and having legalised pleasure inside u all night long nah doesn’t sound too cheesy…however my main worry and truthfully speaking is the whole the new chapter of FOREVER….will I really reach forever and not tire before the next best thing comes available to look at ..you know nice  pair of breasts , perfect legs, hot body or even new 22yr old hottie when I m 45 with sagging breasts, varicose veins and have added inches to my waist.. In a world where there are so many options out there e.g. open relationships, pre-nupts, and all these boundaries whether limited or wide open: how am I to survive? Has humanity gone to the extent of anticipating disappointment because we as humankind are so not fidel anymore….As girls we grow up believing and looking forward to the day when you get married….but the fairytale and princess wedding always doesn’t happen as there is so much that sets us back many highs and lows troughs and all…..What happens when u hit that snag in the middle of the highway in “heaven”..there is no manual or policy or wave~book that helps deal with all these things and gradually we are left to formulate a strategy to keep FOREVER together.. its funny how the beginning of FOREVER comes with a manual which is embedded with words known as vows that are recited over and over by each and every bride and groom at their FOREVER day…and how so easily broken they are in the next couple of few years really….VOWS should be changed from the traditional ones which encompass ” I, (name), take you (name), to be my (wife/husband), to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; from this day forward until death do us part. ” people should be allowed to say vows that state in cheating and all that other crap that comes with it too…cause that’s when marriages get broken, trust dies, and those are not worse times in a marriage they are hell and apparently most marriages for women die the day the man cheat….the trauma and hell they are put through…its never easy to rise back up and walk with your head up high…the ball game changes and FOREVER becomes for as long as we cannot tire….So it makes me wonder as a single girl should I get into this union of FOREVER WITH CAUTION or should I be blissfully in love and ignore all the red flags that come with, in or before…

Replacement or substitution

Replacement or substitution.

Replacement or substitution

I was always wondering how if you look at life there is always some of rules and regulations that govern us. In our families,with our friends colleagues and friends .Why is there always that special selection among peers to always limit your friendships or talks to this one i relate my personal feelings,this one i talk about school with this one i limit her or himself to this…if in actual fact coz of our limitations ask yourself really how many true people do you have on your side or you can call friends..

It brings me to the aspect of asking what is it that i can call a friend,,,,is it a passer by who just comes forth to me once in a while or one of those whom i generally know i can call in the middle of the night and they will genuinely come to my rescue..Do we still have those friendships that we had as children whereby we knew our friendship was up for keeps always…do we allow the new people in our lives to enjoy the maximum full benefits of being our friends or do we shun them in the beginning and make them feel like their contribution to our life is next to something we can not notice..it makes me wonder really what is the essence of friendship……..

so u might be asking why the topic replacement or substitution in connection with friendship…Ever heard the statement two is company and three is a crowd..that statement i have grown to know holds so much water in this environment we live in…in friendships whereby you are trying to fit in and become a part of but every time you feel that all your concerted efforts are in vain u just cant penetrate,the boundaries can be set so high that you might even hurt yourself trying to climb the wall..so u retreat and move away with your tail tucked between your legs..

you watch as their friendship blossoms and just become the usual passer by..you had tried everything before hand to belong then all of a sudden you realize wasted efforts…then it so happens that one day between the two cherry blossoms forces of nature happen and each one has to go their own separate route..you aren’t moved really its not your place to be moved rather its your place to just continue as before watch the game from the terraces . As you watch from the terraces you then realize that a suction plug encapsulates you and forces start pulling you in a route you never knew existed…a few occasional hies,a few ten minute chit chats before you know its one hour long conversations and advice seeking and before you know it you are in the zone….the zone which you once could not fit in you suddenly become the epitome and star of it …………all in one diversion rather ..but what happened what really has changed…check yourself the surrounding and everything around you and you will realize that you are a replacement to fill in the gap that the other person has left.it leaves you to ask the genuineness of your companionship..why am i good enough now when then i was an outsider ..it makes me feel like what Blair Waldorf would call a “minion”.the run around…. the wholeness and entity of the universe we can never know but the issue of being a replacement totally sucks big time ……….i think sometimes i would rather be alone than know i am a replacement..i mean ask yourself what has changed now…i would rather be the woman who is independent of anyone and not really be worried about belonging as it has its own downfalls people and their expectations generally can leave you feeling very unappreciated therefore i would rather be one who minds my own issues than be somebody’s replacement if i did not fit then why should i fit in now…………….

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